By JULIE LARRIVEE - GM Today Correspondent

Many obituaries and death notices these days ask the friends and family of the deceased to make contributions to a specified charity or organizatin instead of sending flowers to the funeral, and the funeral homes and flower shops have both taken note.

"There is definitely a reduction in flowers at funerals," confirms Blane Goodman of Blane Goodman Funeral Service in Mequon. "It seems that there has been an increase in asking for contributions since 9/11. Other disasters, such as the tsunami and hurricanes, just make people want to do good things with their money."

Craig Plopper, funeral director with Mueller Funeral Homes in Grafton and Cedarburg, adds, "There are more and more funerals where they ask for donations. The simple fact is that many people think flowers are a waste of their money. If someone does send something, it’s often a green plant because those keep. Cut flowers just die so quickly."

Goodman says an increase in the number of graveside funerals is another factor that makes flowers less practical for those planning a funeral. "Due to logistics and setup, it’s just not conducive to having flowers. In many instances, the weather - cold or hot - contributes to the flowers not lasting."

He adds that another trend that has reduced the number of floral arrangements is that certain religions are returning to more traditional practices in which flowers are discouraged.

Steve Schramka with Schramka-Densow Funeral Home in Thiensville says that the phrase "in lieu of flowers," doesn’t mean not to send flowers. It just means that donations are another option. "Please omit" is a request for no flowers. He remarks that some families choose to say nothing so as "not to dictate how others express their sympathy."

Plopper also believes that families don’t intend to direct what people do to offer their sympathy, but rather choose donations as a way of giving guidance for something that will be appreciated.

Remembrances are frequently earmarked for a favorite cause or concern of the deceased’s. "Often memorials are to a church, a school or favorite charity," shares Plopper. "Often it’s toward something related to the person’s death where the family would like to see money going toward that cause." Families may specify more than one charity so that the person expressing sympathy doesn’t feel he must contribute to a cause that he doesn’t personally support. "Many just say ‘donate to the charity of your choice’ which is nice," Goodman says.

Nancy Witte Dycus, owner of Fantasy Flowers in Thiensville, has been in the floral industry for 30 years. She, too, has seen a change in funeral practices.

"It used to be that donations, other than perhaps to the person’s church, were not common at all," she relates. "The amount of flowers we take to funerals has dropped significantly. Now, it is more common, if someone is sending flowers, for them to be delivered to a home."

There are many who enjoy sending flowers and others for whom "this is the only thing they know to do to express sympathy," Witte Dycus says. Families who request no flowers might not understand the weight of that decision.

"People may not realize how important flowers are. They really do make people feel better. Parts of the funeral can be distressing and having the flowers there can be comforting," the Thiensville florist relates.

Schramka agrees, "There’s this movement to become more and more pragmatic and more rational about things. However, that comes at the risk of ignoring some of our basic needs. Flowers are a metaphor for life. Flowers are symbolic of our sympathy."

He believes that there are events in life for which flowers are a crucial component. "Can you think of a wedding without flowers?" he asks. "I hope people really will consider why they are asking that there to be no flowers at a funeral. There are just certain things - like flowers at weddings and funerals - that are a part of life. They satisfy basic human needs - historical, cultural and even biological needs - that we have."

Witte Dycus wonders if the choice for donations might also be a sort of default decision for those planning the funeral.

"So often they’re confused and just don’t know what to do," she relates. "They just can’t handle doing anything more. So, maybe it’s a way for them to make one less decision."

This story appeared in the Ozaukee County News Graphic on December 6, 2005

SOURCE: gmtoday

Together, we can make a difference ...
It All Begins With You

For more information regarding this campaign contact

Renee Carpenter TMFA
Memorial City Florist
(713) 461-1138
E-mail: Allied Florists of Houston Public Relations Chair

When you look for a florist, look for the Allied Florist logo
- your assurance of Professional Quality and Service.

Allied Florists of Houston

Allied Florists of Houston
c/o Taylor Wholesale Florist
1601 West 21st Street
Houston, TX 77008
Email Us!

Should you experience difficulty while searching through
the web site, please notify the webmaster

Built and Maintained by ILocalFlorist.com

Allied Florists of Houston

The Association of Professional Florists

"It All Begins With You"

December 2005

In lieu of flowers Those four simple words have heralded a sea change in the funeral industry, reflecting our changing cultural values and wilting the bottom lines of flower companies. But has this new preference for practicality come at the expense of something just as important?

Together, we can make a difference ... It All Begins With You

For more information regarding this campaign contact

In lieu of flowers
Those four simple words have heralded a sea change in the funeral industry, reflecting our changing cultural values and wilting the bottom lines of flower companies. But has this new preference for practicality come at the expense of something just as important?

Together, we can make a difference ...
It All Begins With You